God

8 – The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.

9 – He will not always accuse, nor will He harbor His anger forever;

10 – He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.

11 – For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His love for those who fear Him;

12 – as far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.

13 – As a father has compassion on His children, so the Lord has compassion on His children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him.

Last week when Hurricane Irene hit I was sure we would lose power at our house. It’s not that I’m pessimistic…it’s just that our street seems prone to power loss. Ask John or Jennifer Crocker and they will agree. So with lessons learned from past power outages we stocked up on flashlight batteries and set out the candles and matches. We bought bottled water, got ice, and made sure our cell-phones were fully charged—but when the storm finally hit God blessed us—and DOUBLY so! First, we NEVER lost power and second, Daniel and Ashley DID which was bad for them but good for us because it meant we got to enjoy their company for two days—DOUBLE blessings! I’ve found that, this is one of the benefits of storms in this busy county of ours. Blizzards and hurricanes force things to stop so you can have time to be together as a family!

Well, once they got their frozen stuff in our freezer Daniel and I got to talking about a tree house he wants to build in his back yard for his soon-to-arrive daughter and my soon-to-arrive Grand daughter. Daniel showed me an E-book he had purchased that tells everything you need to know when it comes to building tree-houses. And, it was great fun to leaf through the book’s various plans. We settled on a “Hobbit House” tree house design. The book had an entire chapter devoted to it. Now I know that for Tolkien purists this design doesn’t make sense because after all, Hobbits don’t live in trees…they live underground. But that didn’t matter to Daniel and me. We just liked the “ginger-bread style soffits” and the woodsie look of that particular design. To us it seemed like something a little girl would enjoy.

And, as I inferred, it’s a great book to read on this kind of thing because it’s very thorough. It explains what materials will be needed, which tools are required. It even includes detailed BLUEPRINTS. Daniel wants to get started right away—his desire is to have the “Hobbit Tree House” under roof before the WINTER storms arrive. We’ll see about that—but when we do get to work I can assure you our eyes will be glued to those BLUEPRINTS…because I have almost no experience in carpentry…which means I’ll need the detailed guidance of that book. After all, we want to build a safe tree-house that can be enjoyed for years to come. And—that’s the way it is with any important PROJECT or TASK. We always look for a specific guideline to follow—plans to refer to—instructions to read.

I bring this up because one of the most important tasks we men face—is FATHERHOOD. In fact, with that in mind today Bobby and I are beginning a four-week sermon series that deals with how to accomplish this task in a way that pleases God. The idea is too study the Biblical record of some fatherly examples in the hopes of learning from them. Here’s the schedule:

Next week we’ll study the parenting style of Abraham.

The following Sunday Bobby will lead us as we focus on Eli.

On September 25th we’ll see what we can learn from Jacob,

…and today we BEGIN by looking at the only perfect Father: God Himself—Whose parenting is of course the blueprint that all dads should follow.

Now—the reason we’re doing this NOW instead of during the “Father’s Day Season” is because in a few weeks a new MOVIE will hit the theaters and it deals with this subject. Specifically it focuses on men having enough courage to be a Godly father and it’s produced by Sherwood Pictures—the same people who gave us Fireproof and Facing the Giants. It’s called: Courageous and it premiers September 30. By the way, I’d like to get a group to join me in seeing it on Sunday afternoon October 2. Put it on your calendar. Wives are welcome! Let’s plan on grabbing a quick lunch after church that day and heading to the RIO! I’ll be sure to publicize show-times once they are posted. Maybe we can find a way to get some kind of church group discount. We’ll see.

Now—I think the Christ-followers at Sherwood Pictures felt led to make this movie to remind us how vitally important it is for men to take seriously the responsibility of being a father. This is a message we men need to hear because the sad truth is that these days many men are ignoring God’s blueprint for fathering and failing miserably in this area. I can’t help bu think about the dad who had been drinking too much this week and got angry at his seven-year-old son. They were on a tour boat of some sort—and this drunken dad lost his cool and threw his little boy overboard because he wouldn’t stop crying. Bystanders came to the little guy’s rescue. I know this is an extreme example but to me it puts a spotlight on the fact that our culture has produced dads who don’t take their roll as fathers as seriously as they ought.

The fact is our children have needs that can only be met by dads who do the job right and studies confirm this over and over again. As James L. Schaller writes, “The absence of a mature father-child connection creates a void in the soul, a residual ‘father hunger.’” And Robert Bly says that due to the absence of many dads, this generation thirsts for what he calls, “father water.”

Experts like these two realize that fathers give children—for good or bad—what no one else can. I mean, consider the power, say….in a father’s WORDS when he says things like: “I believe in you, Son.” “I’m so proud of you.” OR “Why can’t you ever do anything right?” “Why couldn’t you be more like your sister?” Those are words that, will stay with a child for the rest of his or her life and they demonstrate that a father IS indeed one of the most powerful beings on the face of this earth. A man has the ability to shape the leaders and parents of the twenty-first century, whether he does so by his courageous commitment OR by his irresponsible—cowardly—absence.

And as I have said, some fathers are not using their power wisely. Many men have lessened or even lost their roles as influential fathers, some by their own choice. Here are some statistics that bear this out:

• Today 24 million children live without their biological fathers. This is a number that has been rising steadily since 1960.
• In a recent survey of 1600 adult men, more than 50% said their fathers were emotionally absent from them while they were growing up.
• In another survey only 34% said that they considered their own father to be a role model.

Now…why has this happened? Why have so many dads ignored their vital parenting role? In his book The Heart of a Father, Dr. Ken Canfield cites several factors:

(1) First, he points out that in our culture there is a widespread loss of vision for the FUTURE.

You see, for years our society was focused on our POSTERITY, but no longer. Instead, IMMEDIATE happiness has become the all-consuming goal for many adults. Because of this more and more dads put their individual preferences ahead of their children’s needs. They care more about the PRESENT…about having a good time…enjoying their lives….than they do the investment in the FUTURE that children really are.

Gordon MacDonald tells a story about Boswell, the famous biographer of Samuel Johnson. In his writings, Boswell frequently mentioned a special childhood memory—a day he spent fishing with his dad. Apparently Boswell’s life had been positively affected by this single day, for he constantly referred to the many matters his father had tutored him about on that one occasion. Well, many years later, someone stumbled across the following entry in his father’s journal. These are the words penned by Boswell’s dad on the day that had meant so much to his son: “Gone fishing today with my son; a day wasted.”

Fathers would be wise to realize that time spent with our children is NEVER wasted. It is a priceless investment in their future—and we lose the opportunity to invest in this future if we don’t take advantage of it when we can. Listen dads, we can never get back time lost with our kids. For example: If you have a 12 year old….two thirds of your time with you is gone…never to return. And by the time they are 12 they would rather be with their friends than you anyway….so really 85 to 90% of their time with you is gone. Invest your time in your children now—because you never get it back again.

(2) A second factor that Canfield points out is a loss of PRIORITIES.

You see, men are especially prone to finding their identity through their WORK rather than their family and so they tend to focus on things like career achievements, high salary, and job title. As a result, many of us no longer adhere to the philosophy that says that raising great kids is a source of pride. We have forgotten what is truly important in life. In his now classic book, Man in the Mirror, Patrick Morley says that when his children were toddlers, he was always uptight about the new scratches which showed up daily on their coffee table. He writes, “This was a real point of contention with my wife, who could care less about such matters. My blood boiled when I spotted a new nick in the luster of the smooth-grained wood. Finally, Patsy couldn’t take it anymore and said, ‘You leave my children alone! I’ll not have you ruining a million-dollar child over a $300 table!” Like Morley, many dads today forget how precious…how valuable…their children are, especially in comparison to temporary worldly possessions and pleasures.

(3) And then…these days there seems to be a general loss of a sense of DUTY and COMMITMENT.

Many fathers no longer feel a responsibility to SACRIFICE for their kids. I heard this week about a survey that showed that parents are much less-likely today to sacrifice so their kids can go to college. Now, believe me, I know that college costs have skyrocketed…but I think it’s still our job as dads to find a way—with God’s help—to provide a good education for our children. After all, God has charged us with preparing our kids for life—but in spite of this many fathers have forgotten or ignored this charge….because they don’t want to sacrifice their own wants to meet their kids’ needs. Steve May tells of a selfish young father who pointed at his infant son and said, “There goes my chance for ever having a boat. As soon as I get the hospital bill paid, he’ll need braces, and by the time I get those paid for, he’ll want a car. When it’s paid off, it’ll be time to pay for college. By then I’ll be too old to want a boat.” This young dad was probably being facetious….but to a limited extent he was also speaking the truth. Being a father requires sacrifices on our part. There are some things we have to do without in life because we have a greater obligation to provide for our children. They come first! By the way….truly great fathers never tell their kids how much they sacrifice on their behalf. The last thing your kids need to hear is, “If it weren’t for you I would have a boat.”

(4) One final factor Canfield notes is a loss of COMMUNITY.

I mean, INDIVIDUALISM has run amok. Involved fatherhood has become a private matter, and fathers rarely communicate with other dads about fathering. So…all this goes to show that Henri Nouwen was apparently right when he predicted back in the 70’s that the coming generation would be known by its sense of…father-LESSness.

And, this is a sad state for any society to be in for many reasons:

• Fatherless children are more likely to commit crimes and engage in substance abuse.
• On average fatherless children score lower on tests and have lower grade point averages.
• Children of father-absent families are five times more likely to be poor and ten times more likely to be extremely poor.
• Adolescents in mother-only families are more likely to be sexually active, and daughters are more likely to become single-parent mothers.

But the poison spread by fathers that don’t take their parenting seriously goes even deeper. As many as 75% of teen suicides and 80% of psychiatric admissions come from broken homes—families where the father just did not have the guts to do his God-given job.

Now….fortunately, in the midst of all this BAD news there is some GOOD news. Thanks to movements like Promise-keepers and Men’s Fraternity I think I see—at least in our churches—a growing awareness of the importance of fathers. More and more men these days DO want to be effective fathers.. They love their kids and recognize their potential influence on their children and want to use it for good. But a key roadblock in recovering our positive power as dads is that we lack complete and effective MODELS. We don’t have blueprints to follow. Historically men learned to father by following the example of their own dads. They kept their eyes open and watched daily how it was done. Even television used to provide good role model fathers…from The Rifleman’s Lucas McCain to The Cosby Show’s Heathcliff Huxtable…but these days the dads TV provides tend to be more on the level of Homer Simpson or I Love Raymond’s Frank Barone.

I’m saying the sad fact is many sons these days don’t have a good fatherly model to follow…and since this is true, I think it would be important…for all fathers present…even future fathers…and single-parent moms who serve as fathers…to commit to pattern their fathering after the only PERFECT model for a father there is: GOD.

Not only will this benefit our parenting—it will also help our kids grow spiritually. You see, our kids naturally want to be like us…and if we can be more like God, their understanding of Him will grow by leaps and bounds. It has rightly been said that, “A child is not likely to find a father in God unless he finds something of God in his father.” This reminds me of the story of a pastor who asked the preschool class in his Sunday school to draw a picture of God. Most kids drew rainbows and men with big hands. But, one little girl drew a picture of a man with a suit and tie on. She explained, “I don’t know what God looks like, so I just drew my daddy instead.”

As you no doubt realize, in the Bible God is repeatedly described as our Father.

In 2nd Corinthians 6:18 God says, “I will be a Father to you, and you will be My sons and daughters…” In Matthew 9:6 Jesus taught us to begin our prayers by saying, “Our FATHER.”

In Romans 8:15 it says that as Christians, we are to call God “Abba” which means “Daddy.” Now—there are many facets of God’s parenting that we could study together, but our text for this morning cites three of them…three principles that any earthly father should embrace…

(1)…and the first is this: We must be PATIENT like God..

Verse 8 says, “The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger…” In other words God is PATIENT. As our “ABBA” He has a long fuse. He is not easily angered.This verse is actually a quotation of something Moses had written some 500 years earlier. It’s recorded in Exodus 34 and comes from the time Moses was up on the top of Mt. Sinai conferring with God. You’ll remember that while this was going on, down below the people were having a party characterized by drunkenness and immorality. These people whom God had just delivered from bondage in Egypt…were expressing their “gratitude” to their Heavenly Father by worshiping an idol of a golden calf made from discarded jewelry. When God told Moses what was going on Moses came down from the mountain and angrily shattered the original copy of The Ten Commandments…the only time we know of when all Ten Commandments were broken simultaneously!

Well, God was also angry and wanted to destroy the people….but in answer to Moses’ pleading on the people’s behalf, God reconsidered. He even promised to give Moses a new copy of the Ten Commandments. God took Moses back to the top of Mount Sinai, and before He began dictating these moral imperatives a second time, Exodus 34 says that God passed in front of Moses proclaiming, “The Lord…the compassionate and gracious God, is slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.”

Now…as this text shows like any parent, God does get angry. But He puts up with a great deal before reaching His boiling point. He is indeed VERY PATIENT with us. And earthly fathers should follow His example. We get mad at the things our kids do….but we must learn to control our anger….to be patient with our children. We must understand that they are not finished growing yet. We must believe in their future potential and patiently we work toward it. We must see beyond the present to the finish line of parenting when our kids will finally be mature and able to face life on their own. That’s what we are preparing them for. That’s our job. There are times when we feel like quitting…but as dads we can’t do that. No—like our long-suffering Heavenly Father, we have to be patient. We have to hang in there for the long haul.

In 1983, Australia hosted its ultra-marathon, a 573.7 mile foot race from Sydney to Melbourne. This is a race that takes days to run, and professionals from all over the world came to participate. Shortly before the race began, a 61-year-old farmer named Cliff Young, wearing overalls and goulashes over his boots, walked up to the registration table and requested a number to enter the race. The people at the registration table thought it was a joke—that somebody was setting them up—so they laughed. But Cliff Young said, “No, I’d really like to run.” So they gave him a number and pinned it on his old overalls. Cliff Young walked over to the start of the race. All the other professional runners, who were decked out in all their running regalia, looked at him like he was crazy. The crowd snickered. They laughed even more when the gun went off and the race began, because all those professional runners had sculpted bodies and beautiful strides, but not Cliff Young. He didn’t run at all like a runner. Cliff Young ran with an awkward, goofy-looking shuffle. All through the crowd people were laughing, and finally, someone called out, “Get that old fool off the track!” Five days, 14 hours, and four minutes later, at 1:25 in the morning, Cliff Young shuffled across the finish line of the 573.7 mile ultra-marathon. He had won the race! And he didn’t win by a matter of minutes or even an hour or two. The second place runner was nine hours and 56 minutes behind him. Cliff Young had set a new world record for the ultra-marathon! The press mobbed him wondering what kind of special running shoes he must have had, and they rummaged through his backpack wondering what he’d survived on thinking that might have been his secret. Well they hit a dead end there because he’d lived primarily on pumpkin seeds and water—but then they discovered the secret to his success: Cliff Young had shuffled his way to victory without ever sleeping. The other runners would run for 18 hours straight, and then stop and sleep for three or four hours. But not Cliff. He endured running five days, 14 hours, and four minutes—without stopping—at the age of 61.

Well, in a sense parenting is like that. It’s a race we run for not five days but more like 20 years. It’s something that starts the day our kids are born and doesn’t end until they choose the nursing home to put us in. Over the years there are times when you feel like quitting but you don’t. There are times when you think you can take a break but you can’t. You see, fatherhood is a non-stop kind of job…a job that requires the patience of a marathoner. You believe in the finished product so you hang in there no matter what. You don’t quit ever. And—remember—that’s the way God is with us. He is LONG-suffering—and we must emulate Him in this if we want to positively impact our sons and daughters. We must be patient with our children….reflecting God’s patience with us.

A second characteristic of our Heavenly Father that we should imitate is this:

(2) We must be FORGIVING like God. Remember what it said in verses 9 & 12?

“He will not always accuse, nor will He harbor His anger forever…as far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.” A man once complained to his buddy that whenever he argued with his wife, she got historical. His friend said, “You mean hysterical.” He said, “No, historical. She dredges up the past and reminds me of every time I’ve failed her in the past.” And….sadly enough we do that with our kids sometimes, don’t we?

Our kids do something wrong, and we remind them of the previous forty-three times that they did the same thing.

Thankfully our Father God is not this way. He will not always accuse nor will He harbor His anger forever. He forgives. God chooses to have a short memory when it comes to our sins. This is good because Psalm 130:3 tells us that if God kept a detailed record of our sins, none of us would ever be able to stand before Him. In Isaiah 57:16, God says, “If I kept throwing up in your face your past failures, if I chose to retain an angry disposition toward you because of your sin….your spirit within you would grow faint before Me. You would wither up and die.”

Can you imagine how this might sound? I would go to God for forgiveness because I’d done something wrong. I’d say, “I did it again, God. I doubted Your provision and tried to take care of things like sermon prep and college expenses in my own strength. Oh, please cleanse me from this sin and give me the courage to trust You in the future.” And God would say, “You did it again? That’s putting it rather mildly, Mark. This is the seventy-third time you’ve done it this week. And I stop forgiving after fifty. Sorry, pal, but your punch card is all punched out.”

Thank goodness God isn’t this kind of Father! Once I’ve sought His forgiveness, He doesn’t keep on accusing. He doesn’t keep on harboring His anger toward me. He chooses to have a short memory where previously forgiven sins are concerned. Scripture says God doesn’t treat us according to what we DESERVE. He treats us according to what we NEED. He forgives us….and FORGETS our sin. In fact the psalmist tells us that when we ask God to forgive our sins, He removes them as far as the east is from the west and remembers them no more. Do you know how far that is? Truth is, it can’t even be measured. Get a globe and you’ll see that actually east and west are further apart than the north and south. If we start in North America and go north, eventually we get to the top of the globe at the North Pole. If I continue the same direction, I start going south. Eventually the north meets the south. But if I start in Maryland and keep going east, when will I start going west? No…never. The psalmist says God will remove our sin from us—not as far as the north is from the south, but as far as the east is from the west. An infinite distance!

If you ever wondered how serious God is about taking care of your sin, He has all sorts of metaphors in Scripture like this one to describe what He desires to do with your sin.

• Micah 7:19 says, “He will trample it under foot and throw it into the deepest part of the sea.”
• Isaiah 38:17 says He’ll put it behind His back where He can’t see it.
• Isaiah 43:25 says He’ll blot it out.
• Isaiah 44:22 says He’ll sweep it away just like a morning mist that gets burned off by the sun.
• Jeremiah 31:34 says God will refuse to remember it; He’ll just block it out of His memory.

And we need to follow His example in forgiving our children. They need our forgiveness. They need us to give them a clean slate when they mess up. They need us to give them a chance to start over when they fail. In fact, forgiveness is the only thing that will make them believe they CAN start over and do better the next time.

(3) And then, one other characteristic of our Heavenly Father that we must emulate is this: We must LOVE like God.

This Psalm is full of proclamations of God’s love. Verse 8 says that God is, “abounding in love.” According to verse 17 God’s love for us is, “from everlasting to everlasting…” Verse 11 says, “He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His love for those who fear Him.” In these verses the Psalmist is saying that God loves us with an unbelievably great love. In fact it proclaims the wonderful truth that God loves us even if we don’t deserve it. His is an unconditional love—a love that is not based on our actions. It is a love that we don’t have to earn.

And dads, we need to remember to love our children in this same way….they need our love…especially when they don’t deserve it. You see only this caliber of love gives them the anchor they need in life—an anchor that shows them we believe they can learn from their mistakes and grow and mature. This week I read about Kim Shin Jo, a gentle pastor from South Korea, who used to be a trained killer. In January of 1968, Jo and a team of assassins descended from North Korean, slipping through the woods in a daring attempt to kill the president of South Korea. The team of 31 commandos made it to within a few hundred meters of the president’s residence before they were intercepted. A fierce battle ensued, killing 30 South Koreans. All of the North Korean soldiers were killed, except one who escaped and Kim Shin Jo, who was captured. After months of interrogation, and through a surprising friendship with a South Korean army general, Kim Shin Jo’s hard heart started to soften. Later he would confess, “I tried to kill the president. I was the enemy. But the South Korean people showed me sympathy and forgiveness. I was touched and moved.” The South Korean government eventually released Kim Shin Jo. Over the next three decades he worked for the military, became a citizen, and then married and raised a family. Finally, he became a church minister. Today Jo’s life serves as a symbol of redemption for the entire country of South Korea. Reflecting on the day of his arrest, Kim Shin Jo commented, “On that day, Kim Shin Jo died. I was reborn. I got my second chance. And I’m thankful for that.” Kim Shin Jo found a new birth and God’s grace through the power of Christ. But his encounter with Christ came through the unexpected, surprising love of other people. Despite his betrayals and sins, an army officer accepted him, befriended him, and believed in him. At one time he was the enemy of the South Korean people, but in the spirit of Jesus Christ, they surprised him with the startling gifts of belonging, forgiveness and even citizenship. In a similar way fathers are called to love their kids no matter what. Only that kind of unconditional “father-love” can empower them to become the kind of people God calls them to be.

Now, I have never met a father who has said, “I don’t love my children.” Of course, all fathers love their children. But there are too many of us who drop the ball. We don’t express our love. We don’t show it…or when we do it is only at certain times, in reward for certain types of behavior. And as a result, our kids get the idea that our love for them is conditional. So, we must learn to express a Godly, unconditional love to our children…

God IS the perfect Father and this Psalm reminds us of three of the many reasons this is so….

….He is patient with His children…

….He forgives His children…

….And He loves His children unconditionally….

Wouldn’t you like to BE a parent like that? Or think of it in another way….wouldn’t you like to HAVE a parent like that? I mean, if you don’t know God personally….can you imagine how wonderful it would be to have a relationship with Him in which you experience His patience….His forgiveness…..His unconditional love? If you are here this morning and are not a Christian…then hear this: God wants to be your Father…He loves you as you have never been loved….and wants to claim you as His own.

In her story, The Whisper Test, Mary Ann Bird writes:

I grew up knowing I was different, and I hated it. I was born with a cleft palate, and when I started school, my classmates made it clear to me how I looked to others: a little girl with a misshapen lip, crooked nose, lopsided teeth, and garbled speech. When schoolmates asked, ‘What happened to your lip?’ I’d tell them I’d fallen and cut it on a piece of glass. Somehow it seemed more acceptable to have suffered an accident than to have been born different…..I was convinced that no one outside my family could love me.

There was, however, a teacher in the second grade whom we all adored. Her name was Mrs. Leonard. She was a short, round, happy, sparkling lady. Every year we had a hearing test. Mrs. Leonard gave the test to everyone in the class, and one year I went last. I knew from past years that as we stood against the door and covered one ear, the teacher sitting at her desk would whisper something, and we would have to repeat it back–things like ‘The sky is blue’ or ‘Do you have new shoes?’ I waited there and listened and heard words that God must have put into her mouth, seven words that changed my life. Mrs. Leonard said, in her whisper, ‘I wish you were my little girl.’

You know, to every person deformed by sin, God says, “I wish you were my son” or “I wish you were my daughter.” If you are here and have not experienced this sonship then I urge you to ask Jesus to come into your heart and life and thereby come to experience the truth of 1 John 3:1 firsthand, where it says, “How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” If you decide today to become a child of God….by your profession of faith in His Son, I invite you to make that decision public by walking forward and sharing that commitment with me. Others of us may have other decisions to make today….to commit to being more like God in our parenting. Some of you may feel led to join this church family. Any decision you wish to make public, I invite you to do so by walking forward as we stand now and sing.